Labourer!'s Journal

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New season guide issued by the Irish Gubbermint.

18 September 2009 11:22:54

Official Guide To Seasons

This is the new guide to the Irish seasons. All other references to 'Spring', 'Autumn' etc are now obsolete and we will be moving forward with this new EU model. All countries in the EU are expected to adopt this seasonal system within the next couple of years. The United Kingdom has already done so, and parts of France, but so far Spain has refused saying it prefers to retain the hotter weather. So very strange!! Below is a link if you can't read the details:

http://i645.photobucket.com/albums/uu180/Labourer_2009/IrishSeasons-1.gif

In order to preserve the water supply for all, Water Wardens will be appointed. Water Wardens will patrol during the wet seasons and will be on the lookout for persons hoarding water in fields, drives, lawns etc. Excess puddles of water will be liable to on the spot fines of a maximun of €1000. This measure, which will be introduced in the December budget, is expected to bring in 7 billion euro over the next few months to make up for the governments generous donation to the banks.

Further measures, such as a new VAT (Vegetable Added Tax), are being considered and European regulations are expected to require the metering of sunshine during early and late summer. Amounts over and above 5 weeks of sunny days may be liable to surcharges.

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Gismo1981 18 September 2009 14:09:48

:O) we wouldnt be charged for much VAT this year so, we were lucky to get 5 days of sunshine.

Rachel 18 September 2009 17:57:51

Bloomin heck - you've hit the nail ont he head with the seasons there, Labourer. It'd be hilarious if it wasn't so true!

flitters 18 September 2009 20:11:54

Well we are safe enough then!!!!!!think I will apply for a job...at least I wont be overworked and underpaid

Mairin 18 September 2009 21:52:05

A good few years ago, I was in an office on a Saturday. The office opened in the mornings only and the only member of staff on was the receptionist from Mongolia. Around 11am, she came down to where I was working and asked me what season it was. Looking at her bizzarily, she hastily explained that it was sunny that morning when she was coming to work but the wind was a cold icy wind, it rained not long after she arrived in and now sleet was falling (except she called it snow). I had to tell her it was spring. At this point, she looked at me rather bizzarily and asked me how did I know this as snow falls in wintertime along with cold icy winds, the sun shines in the summer and the rain falls in spring or autumn. I didn't have an answer except to say that she was now in Ireland. I often thought about what she would have written home to her family about the weather here.